Agenda:1969-07-19

Mother's Agenda 1969
July 19, 1969

  (30:55)

Fr

En

July 19, 1969

[from beginning of audio]

There was someone in America whom I would often see at night, a woman. I would go there, talk, and people answered .... Some of those night activities are strange: I feel as if I enter someone, because I speak, people answer me .... And I don't know whom I enter or what it is. But there was someone I would often see: I would see her house, I would see gatherings (there were gatherings), I would see ... I didn't know who it was. Then, one day, we got a letter from a woman who said that for 1972, she wanted to get a boat and come with a group of people in that boat. I replied, and she sent her photo — it was the person I had seen so often and was in contact with! And she is a woman who seems to have authority there (she looks like a rich woman): she has authority, she knows government people and has written to them. She already has a very large group, there seems to be some good work being done in America. Very receptive and full of energy. I still remember that my conversations [with her] were very interesting. And the other day, her letter came (it was the second or third time she wrote) along with her photo, so I recognized her. That's interesting, because ... (just then the door of Mother's room slams) the contact was constant: the place is constant, the people are constant, and I see them very often, it's not something just random. She wrote to the government to tell them that they should take special interest in Auroville and do something. And she seems to have authority there.

(Sujata goes and sees who slammed the door, then comes back)

What is it? What happened?

Someone opened this door, then closed it again, and nobody is there!

Gone? ... But isn't Champaklal there? ...

No, Mother.

Oh, when no one is there on the landing, some people come upstairs and into the room! ... (Mother laughs) Once there was a big to-do: it was in the morning and I was seeing people, when suddenly there barged in a very tall man. So everyone rushed to him and took him out. It seems that man had written to me that he wanted to see me, and I hadn't replied, so (laughing) he had decided he would come without reply! ... A fairly young man. Afterwards he said (he knew some people here, who told him it was a big scandal), he said, “I don't even know why or how I did it ...” He was waiting there in front of the door on the terrace, and M. who had just seen me came out; thinking the man had come to see me, M. told him, “Come with me,” and the man replied, “Go ahead, I'll follow you,” but instead of following him he came right in here! Then he said he hadn't the least idea how or why he had done it .... So it means there are ‘formations’ waiting there to get hold of people.

(silence)

I have become a little too ‘public’ for my taste .... Yesterday, the whole morning I saw people from the government here. The [Pondicherry] governor comes very often: he comes, sits down, removes his Gandhi cap, then settles there in front of me, and stays for at least five minutes like that [absorbing energies] ... like a sponge.

(silence)

Do you have anything to say?

Last time, you spoke about the subtle physical-about sleep and the subtle physical ....

Yes.

Then you told me ...

Yes, yes, I haven't forgotten!

I must be dense because ...

So then?

Well, yes, I am dense!

(after a long silence)

Nothing has happened?

No, Mother. But I have resumed doing japa. Instead of doing my mantra ‘just like that,’ I have started doing it again systematically. Before going to sleep, for instance ...

Ah!

For about half an hour. I don't know, but anyway I think it's a long process and one has to be patient.

Yes, yes.

(silence)

There's a new phenomenon during the night. One phenomenon was there before, but has grown more precise: it's a place in the subtle physical where those with a body and those without a body are mingled without difference. They have the same reality, the same density and the same conscious, independent existence. There I see ... Last night (or the night before, I don't know), there were things like that: Chandulal was there, Amrita too, they met and talked, made plans together, just as they would have done physically on earth. It wasn't the first time they were meeting, and they said to each other, “I'll tell you tomorrow,” like that, regarding their ideal. Interesting things. There's another ... (Mother tries to remember) Ah, yes, Purani also. They go about there. There's an extraordinary likeness to material life, except that you can feel they're freer in their movement. But that's not new, it's just growing more concrete and precise. What's new is what has taken place these last few nights ...

My sleep is no longer sleep at all, I don't know, it's a sort of ... (gesture as if Mother drew her energies within) withdrawal, that is, I go within, and then I am active. And those people are in that same state. Among them, some are with people who still have a body: it's not just those who no longer have a body. So then, I am also there, and in the same kind of state. But the strange thing is that when I supposedly ‘wake up’ and get up, I go on with something (laughing) that's not physical! You understand, the state of over there goes on, and it's as real, as tangible as physical things; and after half an hour I realize that I have moved about here and done all kinds of things ENTIRELY in that consciousness! ... What's that consciousness?...

It's a very clear, very harmonious consciousness, in which there are no difficulties, and very creative .... I don't know what it is. ... This morning it was peculiar: for a half-hour I was literally there [in that world], and I wasn't aware of it! It's afterwards that I wondered, “But ... is it physically like this?” There was someone, you understand, I was with someone [in that world], and I wondered, “But is this person physically like this? Is it physical?” And I was standing! ... So it's as if the two worlds were ... (Mother slips the fingers of her right hand through those of her left hand). Strange ....

The physical appears to be less imperative, less ... Previously, there was the impression that, all right, it wasn't a ‘dream’ as people call it, but a more subtle and less precise consciousness, and that the physical consciousness was quite concrete and precise (Mother gestures as if to knock against something). But now this distinction ... the other consciousness has become almost more concrete and real than the physical consciousness; the purely material consciousness is more wobbly: the impression of something not too ... not too steady — not too steady, it's odd.

That's odd; it's new, it began two days ago.

We'll see.

(long silence)

Maybe a new consciousness is trying to use this body? ... It's a new consciousness in the sense that what this body did, its activities, all the events of its life, appear in the memory as COMPLETELY different from the way it remembered them — not that events have changed, but the sense or sensation or vision or understanding of things is COMPLETELY, completely different. Completely different. It finds its earlier state ... unconscious to the point of stupidity — for everything, everything. And there is a sort of ... strange gap: it now finds its former state of consciousness artificial, untrue, and ... incredibly stupid; and then, in the new consciousness, the SAME circumstances have a completely different MEANING — another meaning, they give another sensation.

I think there's something changing in here.

And at the same time, a sense of ... (what should I call it?) unimportance, of nothingness, and then the sensation, the perception of the divine Presence, so concrete, so powerful ... that sometimes I get the feeling people will break down! (Mother laughs) That's how it is: when they're here I feel as if ... (gesture) That so-called ‘accident’ of last Wednesday has had a very considerable effect on the body consciousness: it's now very different. The perception of a Power limited only by ... the prudence of an infinite Patience. Like that. And at the same time ... well, what we might call ‘remnants of personality’, reduced to a musty and absolutely unimportant state. The two are there together. But it's very difficult .... For instance, they've taken new photos [of Mother], yesterday I saw a number of them: I looked at them as I would look at the photos of someone else — they were exactly like the photos of someone else! And I passed some comments, mon petit! (laughing) I remember the impression I had while looking at them .... Well, I do think I've changed quite a bit in appearance, too, haven't I? Haven't I changed?

I wouldn't be able to say.

You haven't noticed. Have you seen those photos?

No, Mother.

There must be a big beige envelope there.

(Sujata brings the envelope)

I don't know if they are the ones .... There's a photo taken in profile ....

(Mother and Satprem look at the photos)

You have very different expressions!

Haven't I!

Yes, but you also look very mocking!

One especially ...

A slightly mischievous air ...

(Mother searches among the photos)

It's the eyes that I find different.

That photo isn't here, I don't know where it is .... Ah, here it is (Mother shows a photo taken in profile). Don't you find it strange?

Yes, a little ... Yes, it's not the usual thing.

Isn't it?

Strange ... Yesterday, they had me sign them (because they made lots of them so as to distribute them), and I don't even know who spoke, but when I looked ... (I took the magnifying glass and looked) I said, “Oh ... Oh, she is a dangerous person, she knows too much!” It was exactly the impression ... like what ordinary humanity feels: a sort of fear of someone who knows too much — because it's true, when people are sitting here in front of me and I look at them, I see what they think, I see what they feel, I see what they want, you understand, all of it. It's not that I try to see: it's more visible for me than the features of their faces. So then, it was like their impression: brrr! let's beware! (laughter)

You look a bit Chinese in these photos.

Very Chinese, very Chinese. But long ago, I saw an old Chinese come into me. It was a man, and an old Chinese ....

Through all these photos it's striking.

Yes. But what's most, most extraordinary is this change of consciousness of the BODY! ... You understand, it's as if it were reliving ... they are things that have remained in the consciousness because the psychic being took part — they're very clear, very precise; the rest has been erased (it's been like that for a long time). Well, those things were recorded by the psychic being, and the body had an impression, you understand, an impression of its own; now the psychic consciousness is the same, it sees things in the same way, but the physical impression is completely different! ... Which means it's the PHYSICAL consciousness that has changed.

These last few days it has become very, VERY clear. It began on Wednesday — from Wednesday to today: Wednesday, Thursday, Friday ... It's quite recent.

(Laughing) A dangerous person!

(Satprem lays his forehead on Mother's knees and prepares to leave)

(Mother looks at Satprem) I have a sort of impression that there's going to be a change for you too, for your nights.

We'll see.

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