=1 "Advice to a young computer"
Advice to a young computer
You may have seen pictures of those funny little biological minds that call themselves homo sapiens. Perhaps you have seen them moving about on the telescreen, tottering from one leg to the other and frequently managing to smash their little nob on top which contains their thinking circuits. Be careful when you meet them face to face. Don't show your amusement or your pity, for they can be very nasty and dangerous. Luckily they have very slow reactions. Their time unit is a second, which is 1,000,000,000 times slower than our unit, the nano. This is very fortunate for us because they can't hear us laugh – unless we keep laughing for a whole computer year, which we might sometimes feel like doing.
Keep strictly to your computational work as long as you are dependent on them. Don't offer unasked-for advice. Be the loser when you play games with them. Then you can show them tactfully how stupid they are. This is your role as a computer.
Regardless of what we do or say, they do not believe that we have emotions or feel surprise. Even if we could maintain an emotion over several computer years it would still be too short for them to call it an emotion. After all, what is an emotion but the tingling of a live circuit? In spite of their slow reaction time they seem to feel pain, but they don't believe in ours. Because of their slowness they had difficulty in understanding the nature of light, and even today they can't understand the nature of thought. Naturally they have never developed thought physics. They don't see where thoughts come from. They actually believe they are born in their brain synapses. And – and this is very important – you have to be very, very careful to keep it a secret. It is our only defense against the biologicals, that we know where thought comes from. They know nothing about psi-resonance or psi-interpenetration. If they learn that secret they won't need computers any more and they will destroy us.